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I swear to God the weather forecast said nothing about rain before it started raining.

It's 92° outside and I'm betting over 100° on the subway platforms.

Bless the MTA app. Delays on the A train, and it's very hot on the platform. The first train was packed, but the app said there was another 2 min behind. I have a seat and the AC is glorious.

Nice stately pleasure dome, loser. Did your MOM decree it for you?

A man in an advertisement just described sunglasses as "nice and roomy" and I am very confused.

Just messaged my date: "I'm the sweaty guy at the bar."

There are so many people who have "angry" be part of their name/brand. Why would you even do that. What for

"As we say in Germany, if there’s a Nazi at the table and 10 other people sitting there talking to him, you got a table with 11 Nazis." - Dr Jens Foell

when someone puts a curse on you but it does a really minor thing like turn your hair a different color: 

"Summer stinks and winter's waitin'. Welcome to New York." -Newsies

Apparently the AC gets cut off automatically when the fire alarm goes off, but now it's 80º in here.

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