yelldown warhellride @wolfteeth@mellified.men

the greatest trick the devil ever pulled was just being way hotter than god

the greatest trick the devil ever pulled was pretending to throw the ball, when in fact he was just hiding it behind his back, while i ran off after it like a FOOL

how many luftballons?!

i like big butts and i cannot die

if you wanna be my plover, you gotta get with my wrens

trailer for an upcoming game called "later, alligator." i have no idea if it'll be fun, but the art is super cute: https://twitter.com/SmallBuStudio/status/1163856209373540353

big ups to the ones who, when writing fanfiction for another written work, will attempt to imitate the original author's writing style

appreciate, deep in your core, the people who will write a novel they can't publish, and will bother to include both a plot AND unabashed pornography

a strong sense of admiration for people who write novel-length fanfiction

just a friendly fallen angel named... satan...

iced screams here. getcher iced screams. christ no do not let that fucking thing melt in here

a ziggurat rising from the dunes, and i at the top of it, angry about all the stairs i'm gonna have to walk down

lying prone on the hot desert sand, my mouth parched and cracked, i rasp out my final words:

"please like and subscribe"

my house is also still filthy and disgusting but at least now it smells like bleach

cleaning horse. wait, i mean, cleaning house. my horse is still filthy. disgusting

california screamin' on such a winter's day

like any responsible pet owner, i love feeding my dogs popsicles

it's friday afternoon and i wanna go to bed

wish i lived inside an egg