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the greatest trick the devil ever pulled was just being way hotter than god

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the greatest trick the devil ever pulled was pretending to throw the ball, when in fact he was just hiding it behind his back, while i ran off after it like a FOOL

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if you wanna be my plover, you gotta get with my wrens

Top five ways to say it's raining:

5. It's really coming down
4. It's raining
3. The heavens have opened
2. Hell's opened and demons are attacking heaven but God turned them into water and now their corpses are falling on us
1. The stars are peeing

COVID19-adjacent, media, unions 

Let he who has never been Problematic cast the first stone

my favorite takeaways:

- the art always sold well at the PBS auction
- the artist only stopped selling there because some viewers called in to complain one year, so the station stopped auctioning erotic art altogether in fear of losing their FCC license

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If you or someone you know is the owner of this illustrious work of art, please email We are offering $1000 to the owner, and $20,000 to their nearest food bank. We make a lot of jokes, but this is not one of them.


the world's oldest man reveals the secret to his old age

taking out a newspaper ad that's like "kind, gullible, 60% innocent young man looking to be ensnared and held prisoner forever by a evil witch. find me foolishly wandering the forest roads late a night with an easily blown out lantern"

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Thinking about picking something up to read this week or changing up your wall art? I'm doing a mail run tomorrow so now's a great time to try something new!

( #mastoart #art #smallbusiness )

Microsoft I-DOS FAQ:
Hi Bill! Where are my files?

They're on the internet now, I'm afraid! Sorry! Good luck!

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among the best anime openings i have ever seen and that's a pretty high bar

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Honey Mummy Central

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